The Dark Side of Love - Valentine's Masked Ball

Join A Curious Invitation on the eve of Valentine's Day - that anodyne festival of cupids and confectionary - on Friday 13th, a date whose famous ill portent bears ancient associations with deviancy, heresy, betrayal and death .. not to mention a machete-wielding maniac in a hockey mask. For those wanting to get lucky in love what more auspicious opportunity than this lucky-for-some day?

So come and celebrate - or commiserate - the darker side of love. Be regaled by our cast of 200 performers as you drink, dance and debauch yourself into delirium or delinquency.


IN THE BALLROOM OF DESIRE

TROYLUS SEARLL - will take us back to the origins of that lewd and sensuous dance, the waltz, with its emphasis on physical intimacy that outraged respectable folk in the early 19th century. The original dirty dancing.

PERHAPS CONTRAPTION - this nine-piece post-oompah art pop marching band will supply their own acoustic aphrodisiac, featuring the sensual squeeze of the sousaphone, the seductive slide of the trombone, the phallic firmness of the flute and the sheer, well, horniness of the French horn.

ELECTRIC SWING CIRCUS - will put your grandparents' pristine infatuations through the mincer with their seductive blend of 30s swing, gypsy jazz, ska, house and dubstep. The Andrews Sisters backed with dirty synths and breakbeats.

LARRY TEE - the Original Hipster, Party Monster and Godfather of Electroclash will take to the decks as Valentine's Day breaks and lovers and singletons alike, elated or too drunk to care, will move their bodies in unison to his mixes, mash-ups and musical mayhem.



ON THE CABARET STAGE

BENJAMIN LOUCHE, our compere beyond compare, the disreputable and aberrant Lynchean linchpin of the evening.

MISSA BLUE - mistress of raunchy and risque theatre who will stimulate your ardour with her Ceremonial Cabaret and Burning Desire.

MARNIE SCARLETT - deviant Diva, fire fetishist and couturier. She will steal your heart and probably make a nice hat out of it.

UNGEWINSTER - the ringmaster of modern mime, bringing you his Carrollian caterpillar and Maddening Hatter.

THY LAST DROP - Victorian murderpunks evoking the spirit of Jack the Ripper with songs of Bedlam, death and gravedigging.

DJ DIDDY WAH - will vamp the vinyl with his blend of classic blues, surf, rockabilly, R&B, gospel, garage, soul and rock’n’roll.

IN POSEIDON'S PICTURE PALACE
The ultimate immersive cinema experience. Return to your very first love - all of our first loves - your mother - as you slip deliriously down into the watery womb of our bubbling hot tubs. Before long your salt tears will mingle with the blood-hot waters as you drink in classic weepies from Hollywood’s Silver Screen.

IN THE LOVERS' VAULTS
Celebrate the martyrdom of St Valentine, who was beaten to death on the orders of the Emperor Claudius II, in our Dungeon of Despair and Delights where you can subject your imperfect and unworthy body to the attentions of Mistress Ivy and Captain Crop. Surrender both mind and flesh to experience the most perfect pain, the most exquisite sensation, the ultimate consummation.

AT THE FEAST OF ST VALENTINE
Feed your lover smoked salmon blinis, asparagus wrapped in prosciutto and stilton rarebits, or lie back and receive succour and sustenance from our naked, gold-adorned Cupids, but watch out for the odd cream cake chucked by our mischievous Succubi and Incubi.

IN THE CHAPEL OF LOVE & LOATHE. LOST VAGUENESS'S iconic temple of matrimony from Glastonburys past, where Kate Moss and Pete Doherty tied the knot in 2005. Allow the high priests and holy sisters of the Church of the Annihilation to plight your troth with your loved one or with a complete stranger. But, fear not, your commitment to your new spouse will be for one night only (a bit like Kate and Pete's).

IN BUTTERFLY'S PAGODA
Only in the world of grand opera can love be so unequivocally associated with disease, derangement and death. To the background strains of the Liebestod flirt with mortality yourself by tickling a tarantula, petting a python or stroking a scorpion in TIM MAYNARD's resident creepy-crawly MENAGERIE.

IN THE ONION CELLAR
Gather here all you lovelorn, you broken hearted, you jilted, you two-timed, you romantically dispossessed, as TROYLUS SEARLL plays his LOSS LIEDERS - lamentations on love forfeited, betrayed or unrequited. Then at midnight the DRESS UP DOLLS will don their magic aprons and lead you in onion chopping and mass wallowing in collective misery.