It may seem odd to compile a list directing diners to London's most-expensive eateries but "You get what you pay for" is an adage which seems to have stood the test of time - probably because it is, by and large, completely true.
Ergo, we're actually directing you to some of London best restaurants.
Plus, although perhaps a tad vulgar, you get some decent bragging rights...
As if its location within one of London’s most luxurious hotels and its “reassuringly expensive” menu weren’t enough, the private dining room at Alain Ducasse at the Dorchesteris as opulent as they come. The Table Lumière is sheltered by a circular curtain made from over four thousand fibre optic lights which falls from floor to ceiling, and guests eat off Hermès china. But perhaps its most extravagant aspect is that it’s positioned in the middle of the dining room, in full view of envious diners.
Pierre Gagnaire’s superb menu (langoustine tartare with salmon eggs and vodka granita, foie gras ice cream with tandoori – need we say more?) is served in an amazing technicolour dining room that looks like a Dali painting if he’d been born in Nairobi instead of Figueres.
There’s proof that Camden has shaken off its grungy image at the Stables Market, home to two of London’s most OTT restaurants: Pan-Asian Gilgamesh and South African meateaters’ favourite Shaka Zulu. The décor, which features huge wooden carvings covering the ceiling and walls and loud batik print on the furnishings borders on the ridiculous, and the menu has exotic meats like zebra, crocodile, wildebeest and ostrich.
Like a bit of celebrity mixed in with your dim sum? Kate Moss, Jemima Khan and Stella McCartney are often pictured at China Tang, and while we concede that Mr Tang’s flamboyant persona may have something to do with this, the restaurant’s beautiful art deco and Chinoiserie-inspired interior provides suitably chic backdrop for London’s A-list.
At the capital’s opulent restaurant par excellencethe food is inspired by master chef Escoffier’s classic cuisine. With frescoes on the ceiling, chandeliers and gilded furnishings, there is no grander dining room, with the possible exception of where the Royal Family take their supper.
Le Gavroche once made headlines for serving the most expensive meal in history, but you’ll be glad to know it’s possible to eat like an emperor for under £60 if you visit at lunchtime. This veteran French restaurant is decidedly old school, from the carpeted dining room to Michel Roux Jr’s ritual greeting of guests during service.
For holidaying foodies, the flagship of the famously angry celebrity chef is as important an attraction as say, the National Gallery. With three Michelin stars this is the very epitome of the starched white tableclothed-establishment, complemented by perfect service and masterful modern French cooking.
Camden’s original excursion into exhibitionistic flamboyance is this restaurant and nightclub plonked amid the Asian food stalls of the Stables Market. It cost £16 squillion to build this giant venue which attempts to replicate a Babylonian palace via a Hollywood studio circa 1935. With myriad carvings, statues, and a bar made from lapis stone that required the work of ten thousand men (yes really) it’s as fascinating for its design as for the slebs who patronise it. The food, courtesy of Ian Pengelley, is a cut above the usual Pan-Asian fare.