Rock of Ages musical at The Shaftesbury Theatre

It’s hard to find stuff which might be of interest to teenage boys and, as I’m a bit of a rock fan and was thoroughly disappointed with the recent “Rock evening” on X Factor, I persuaded a reluctant friend to come along with me to check out the “Rock of Ages” musical to see if it might appeal. It’s being promoted heavily on the TV right now and it looked like fun whilst the line “London’s guilty pleasure” should have sounded warning bells. The tickets were an eye-watering £65 each so I was hoping I made a sound investment.

The bar at The Shaftesbury was jammed and with a Malibu and Coke (well, the musical is set in the 1980s) costing £5.70 we went in search of a nearby bar. The ultra trendy dark, downstairs bar at Freud was jammed with Halloween celebrations so we moved on down Monmouth Street to Pix where we enjoyed a drink sitting outside as it was so mild.

On entering the theatre I was encouraged to hear some AC/DC playing and smiled at the strange combination of the traditional theatre decor – complete with enormous chandelier – camouflaged with neon signs for nude dancers, Tower Records and fictitious rock bands and Hollywood Boulevard palm trees. The staff were selling bottles of beer rather than programmes and ice creams.

The show opened and I was mightily encouraged to see a video of David Coverdale (lead singer of Whitesnake – one of my all time favourite bands) doing the bit about no cameras or mobile phones. Oh his beautiful dulcet tones are enough to rock women of any age.

So it starts with an impressive guitar solo and a medley of “Just like paradise” and Poison’s “Nothin’ but a good time”. Then Lonny (Simon Lipkin turned out to be the comic star of the show for me) – complete with an impressive mullet hair style – introduces us to the plot. It is about the threat of German property developers taking down the famous Bourbon Room club (owned by Dennis Dupree played by Justin Lee Collins) resisted by plans to stage the last concert of rock band Arsenal whose lead singer (Shayne Ward playing Stacee Jaxx) seduces leading lady Sheree (played by Amy Pemberton) who is the love interest of leading man Drew (an impressive young singer called Oliver Tompsett who was, along with Rachel McFarlane, one of the best singers of the show).

Almost from the outset we are entertained by scantily clad rock chicks gyrating across the stage – we were wondering whether the purple bra of one such female was going to contain all the impressive movement in the boob department (it did). Any young (or old) man watching the performance I am sure would be thoroughly impressed with the risqué choreography and the minimalist but outrageous costume styling! BTW, I have ordered a pair of high heeled red pirate boots…

Some of the songs (e.g. “We built this City”) were a little dubious in terms of their rock roots but others (e.g. “I wanna rock” by Twisted Sister, “Wanted dead or alive” by Bon Jovi and “Harden my heart” by Quarterflash) were more on theme, but they were all performed well. And it was good to hear some classic rock ballads like Foreigner’s “Waiting for a girl like you” and “I wanna know what love is” – Aah! And there was a brilliantly funny scene in the gents loos for the main seduction scene which reduced the potential corniness of these love songs.

I wished that the band – who were on stage throughout – were given a little more of the lime light – they were surprisingly good rock musicians. Just before the interval we were treated to Whitesnake’s “Here I go again” by the entire company – and although this is one of my all time favourites (which drives me to see Whitesnake in concert in Hammersmith every year) about which I am very protective they didn’t do a bad job.

The second half opened with the protesters clashing with the police to “Final Countdown” and then scenes of pole dancing and private dancers in the Venus night club. There were more laughs with the camp Franz (played brilliantly by Sandy Moffat) and the immortal line “I’m not gay, I’m German”. And there was pure comedy magic as two main (male) characters revealed their love for each other whilst singing REO Speedwagon’s “Can’t fight this feeling anymore” – not very rock, but immensely entertaining. Poison’s “Every rose has its thorn” and Survivor’s “The search is over” were performed well too. The plot was dragging a bit here although the suggestive dancing and comic moments helped it along. However, I was somewhat disappointed that the finale number was Journey’s “Don’t stop believing” which has been ruined forever for me by its use in Glee.

The audience (mostly comprising folk on the other side of 40, a surprising number of couples and even a few kids) seemed to adore the show – and what’s not to like with all the jokes, pyrotechnics, glitter and rock music?