Kids in London - Hansel and Gretel at The Barbican

I have to say that I am not a regular at The Barbican. But actually, it’s just a 10 minute (fast) walk from most of the places I work in the City and took only 50 minutes to get my daughter in from West London to meet me there. I will be going more often in future.

Mind you, it's just as well that the signs from the tube station are good as, in the dark, it’s tricky navigating your way through to the Barbican Centre. And the place is huge. My daughter’s eyes were like saucers. And it was so nice to hear some Christmassy choir singing away in the vestibule. We were hopelessly lost when we were in there – down to the loos, around to the cloakroom, back to the cafes, round and around. An adventure. But the staff were fabulously friendly, even the senior ones that I don’t think are there to give directions. Nice.

Anyway. The huge bar and café areas were pleasantly empty at 630pm (although they were truly busy later on in the evening) so we found a seat (amazing!) and enjoyed an unexpected glass of wine (me) and a Coke (her). Then we went to find Hansel and Gretel. Our real adventure had begun.

We were asked to sit close together on the stairs outside the theatre. Groups of schoolgirls (between 10 and 14) sat alongside older couples and young couples. A mixture. Sadly, not many family groups.

At 7pm the guides in their white tee shirts gathered to say a friendly hello and to explain that we were not going to be seated during this performance but that we would be walking around with Hansel and Gretel. There were suitably appreciative oohs and aahs from those of us waiting excitedly on the stairs. And off we set.

Through a dark entrance with great, green fir trees on either side and crunchy wood chips below. It smelled and felt like a real forest. We paused outside a building where a man played a cello quietly and along came a doppelganger for Dorian from Birds of a Feather. She entered the house (and we peered in after her) – which resembled a 70s home – but somewhat more spacious. She dramatically removed a number of children’s items from the house, poured herself a glass of Babycham and then did some animated dancing to the sound of the Bay City Rollers. There were rather a lot of people in the audience who appeared to recognise the songs.

Along came Hansel and Gretel who went into the house – and we followed. Then we witnessed “Dorian”, the wicked stepmother, discover how the children had returned home and prepare an awful meal from rubbish for her two stepchildren and husband. Who rapidly went off to watch the TV (The Goodies and then Morecombe and Wise). So a plot was hatched to lose the children properly the next day…off they went and we watched on TV screens (in a style reminiscent of the Blair Witch Project) their journey through the creepy forest, all alone.

And then we followed! First through a pretty bit of fairylit forest. And we paused to see Hansel and Gretel looking very sad and lost. Then we followed them through some really dark and scary woods – big spiders, snakes and hanging things. The audience really stuck together. Then we went through a Barbarella inspired forest of artistically arranged dolls – and not just Barbies. This was like a modern art exhibition in the midst of the play.

We all breathed a sigh of relief and then gazed in wonder as we watched Hansel and Gretel walk through another beautiful lane with snow and twinkling lights. And then we entered a real Gingerbread House.

Even better, we got to put on party hats and sit at the side (this time on chairs rather than the floor) of a huge table covered in all manner of sweet, delicious things to watch Hansel and Gretel enjoy the delights – and even do a little marshmallow throwing (several members of the audience benefited happily from the ricochets). Our witch-in-disguise friendly old lady did a fabulous song and dance routine to a well known song but with lines like “Don’t talk about diets, it’ll start a riot – give me Fat! Fat! Fat!”. Hilarious.

But then it all went very scary. The nice old lady transformed into a screeching animal of a bad witch. The lovely party table was transformed into a horrible cage and an evil work top. Even the grown ups leaned back as the witch rushed back and forth with her “Cooking with kids” book and imprisoned poor Hansel and forced Gretel into hard labour to fatten him up. The end of the story I cannot tell. But we did end up back at the house to sing “We are family”!

This was pure theatre magic. Even the most fidgety, can’t-sit-still-for-a-minute child would love this. It only lasts 70 minutes and it passed in a flash. We were totally entranced. My daughter couldn’t stop talking about it all the way home. The Catherine Wheels Theatre Company should be congratulated. This has got to be THE really smart and unusual (but suitably festive) holiday treat for your small ones.

There are several performances a day and the show runs til 4th January – please DON’T miss this fabulous entertainment).